Crazy finds crazy!
>> Thursday, October 13, 2005
Ok, so here is the dilemma: I have THREE very different weddings to go to and I must find three adequate dates for each! But this story has complications...
Last week my beautiful friend Lacy was in town, because her HUSBAND had an interview with one of the fancy-shmancy lawfirms. The word "husband" is in caps, because its just so weird for yet another one of my little friends to be MARRIED! (Seems like a minute ago we were pushing fully dressed boys into the pool at camp.)
A bit of a background story: Lacy is from the South (hence the cute name I picked out for her). She is two years younger than me. Was voted "best legs" in our lovely New England summer camp that we attended each summer, (Wallstr and I were tied for a very close second.) Anyway, she played soccer on her high school team, and was also a homecoming queen donning a YELLOW dress. She spent much time in France, walked across Spain (with her HUSBAND who was just in the stages of pursuing her at that time...). She spent time in Prague (where I came to visit). She lived in DC, and let me crash on her couch during one of my brief job hops.
Two months ago she got MARRIED! I didn't go to her wedding. I wanted to see her get married, but I didn't want to go to the wedding... Ok, I've lived through my wild cousin getting married, two of my childhood best friends getting married... these are just the people whose weddings I absolutely was required to go to. I HATE going to weddings. How very annoying. And I'm sorry, I'm only 27, how is it that my YOUNGER friends are now getting married.
Don't get me wrong. Its not that I'm anti-marriage. I'm sure its a wonderful thing, especially logistically! You can share the mortgage, some one is always "automatically" there...(to share dinner with), it's all good. But when your friends get married, logistically that's NOT a good thing. Because:
1. You can ONLY see them in conjunction with the husband/wife
2. You can only see THEM (friend and husband/wife) if you have a date of YOUR OWN to bring along
3. You can't crash in their apartments/houses for no reason anymore...
4. You can't invite them to visit your place unless you have a guest BEDROOM to dedicate to the friend and the husband/wife.
5. You can't even have a decent conversation on the phone with them because no, they "don't know what I mean"... because apparently when you're married and have "on deman" sex every night, VERY LITTLE ELSE carries any meaning anymore!!!!!
Alright, so I have "beef" with my married friends... but this isn't really the point of this post. I've come to a resignation that when a friend gets married, you can kiss her goodbye! (well unless I myself get married and our husbands get along.) HOW annoying!
The relevant point is I have three weddings to go to next year, that I absolutely can't skip, and of course I have to have dates to all of them. I must go because one is a client of mine (the largest client) and being invited to her wedding is a great thing not only for my current job but also for my career - bla- blaaa. Second is one of my really close friends from Germany. She's a bit tricky, she may have her wedding either in Italy (her fiance is Italian) or Germany. If its in Italy, I'm ok, I have a guy to invite. If it's in Germany... I'm in trouble. The third person whose wedding I absolutely cannot miss is one of my best friends in Chicago. I simply don't want to miss hers.
The dilemma is getting perfect dates for all these three events! Who the heck is going to fly overseas with me? (That I WOULD LIKE to bring, I should add). Even the party for my client here in New York is difficult also, being that it is formal and I can't have someone act foolish. (And most boys that I like are young and foolish.) I MUST find appropriate guys to bring to these weddings.
Maybe I should put an ad in the paper?
Ad: Hot guys needed to attend weddings with hot girl (please pick one of three on the calendar attached).
Requirements - Must look good in a tux, not afraid of air travel, be able to handle windy conditions.
Those with heart conditions or asthma may be submitted to additional testing. (Hey, this isn't for the feint of heart.)
A free copy of Financial Times will be provided upon request.
Oh... and during "free time" please be prepared to strip because I may want to sketch you as a part of my newly revived love for art...
Please proceed to sumbit photos to SP HQ. Due to unusually high traffic of response, we will contact you only should interest arrise. Multiple applications will not increase your chances of being selected. Thank you.
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